Day 7 Crazy

I got thrown for a loop and I really didn't expect it then I really went in a great direction but now I am exhausted.   My regular bathroom has been torn apart and I did everything in there. Dressed, makeup, jewelry, cleaning myself. Towels for the hot tub, medications, lotions. You name it and now I am a mess.  I even had the dog in there all the time with me.
I went to the back bathroom which I have lived out of before but it was so small and the lighting sucked and I couldn't see to put on my makeup and I spilled something all over my work clothes and had to change into something that I really didn't want to wear and it even got crazier and crazier.   I really had a great energy at work until I crashed and couldn't think straight.  I got light headed from not eating.  I was going to eat every 2 hours and then I forgot.
I am dropping things, I am not thinking like a Buddha, more like a silly clown.
I just realized that it is a full moon and that may be making waves in my body and mind.  I practice peace and wanting to give peace and light vibrations to everyone.  That they matter, that I can take any crap they want to give me.
The great thing that happened today was I really got in touch with a part of my body I have been ignoring.  My pelvic area.  I want my power back.  My legs are getting stronger, my stomach is pretty tight and hard.  My sexual delight isn't very delighted.  I have ignored that part of my body and I know that so much energy lives there, so much power,  I want to use that power to sing and help the world.   Not sexually but to live a whole life and not ignore any part of my body.  I think there is alot of emotion and great creativity and the courage to give that creativity to people.  I am ready.   Crazy lady is out.  I want to be called Jo.  Or Jo Jo.  How do you like that?  Yes, just call me Jo.   And when you feel playful call me Jo Jo.
This blog is going to be my secret so eat your heart out everyone.   Find your secrets.  Then share them with me . How about that?
Another surprise for the crazy day is that I am so excited to be 60 Years old this year, who would think that.  I sure didn't think I would feel this way about this birthday.  I guess I am glad I am give even another day with all of the stuff that has happened in my life.

Day 6 Secrets

During my morning meditation. I found a place inside me that has never been opened before.  Or if it has it was very very long ago.  I kept myself as a secret because it wasn't safe.  This secret led to many many more secrets and never being able to get very close to many people.  IT was close but not giving myself 100%.  How can I if i can't give it to myself.  This is the best secret that I have uncovered in a very very long time.  It can be a love affair.  That love affair is with me being authentic and living in line with that.  Can you  imagine?  I can't hardly imagine it but I am gonna shout it from the room top.  Because I can and no secrets now.  Look out everyone!!

Day 5 Patterns

Finding the patterns and then  choosing to change them has been something I believe I have been wanting to do all of my life.   I knew I wasn't here to be mean, to suffer, to hurt people.  I wondered why others were so mean.  This was something that I chose to believe to keep me alive when I was little.  I had to survive by protecting myself which made a pattern of hiding and not being myself.  Who ever that was.  Today passing a school play yard and hearing the kids so loud and sounding uninhibited brought tears to my eyes./  I was never that in grade school, in middle school and not until alcohol was introduced to me in high school was I free enough to be me.  Ha what a joke that is because then you make a pattern of only Being when you drink.  I have stopped that pattern and am learning to do it on my own.  I am not afraid.  I am not afraid of my patterns. How about You?

Day 4 In the Moment

All things changed on me today and I didn't allow it to upset me.  I was getting ready for work and got a call as I was dressing that they wouldn't need me today and they won't need me Friday also and then they asked about Saturday and I said I need to work.  It felt good to tell the truth.  I like to work and bring that income into my world.  Then all the plans obviously changed.  I started doing some other things I was going to do tomorrow and that felt good then all things kind of changed.  The dog puked, then the dog peed in the kitchen and my husband caught him and I just felt the old feelings.  I noticed it and I actually went out to my studio alone and allowed myself to breath and listen to what was going on.  I was reacting from past experiences, really ingrained in my cells but I recognized them and I imagined it flowing through me.  Past me. And that felt so so great.  In the moment came to me.  Nothing was happening right then, right now, right then.  I mean even moments after something bothers you you can let go and say nothing is happening right now, no good or no bad.  It may still be happening in your mind but the actual moment.  Think about it. I am so excited to be into Day 4 and when I am in the moment I know everything is OK, but when I go on the ride of my mind many things may be wrong or uncomfortable.  So Be In The Moment, work at it at least once a day to start.  This is from Elle to you... Love, Laughter, Light and Elle.

Day 3 Overwhelm

OK, I really don't want to be overwhelmed but I did get that feeling this afternoon.  I looked around and there are still piles everywhere and I don't want to just move them around I want to rid myself of these things that don't serve me right now in my life.  They are hanging on, clinging to the thought of not ever being able having those kind of items again.  That is the mind of lack not the universal mind of abundance and allowing space for the new.  I truly have had great things happen to me when I let go of items.  Giving them away if they don't sell.  That is OK too.  I am facing this feeling and I am regaining power over it and not allowing it to have power over me.  It is like over eating, drinking, shopping to feel good, to fill you up.  Then you are full of crap.  Sorry for that but we think it makes us feel good and it is simply a cover-up an escape from facing the moment.

This is my 2012 Day 3 Elle ideas.   Thanks and want you to see what overwhelms you and how you might be able to unplug from that and see it in another way, or do something different.

Day 2 Love Affair

I had better get this written and out to the universe.  One thing I wanted to write about was the first year that I wrote a blog I was disappointed that others didn't read it.  So the next year I got weary and didn't write one.   Then the year went by and I hadn't done a yearly tradition.  The other thing I noticed is I was clinging on to an outcome for the first blog.  To become a popular on some level.  I believed I had something that people could benefit from.  And I still think that but the other part is that it benefited myself.  So with that discovery I decided to start another blog for myself and with no attachments. No expectations. Yeah!! with that I feel awesome.  I will see if others want to sign in and read what great things are happening in my life because of a change of thinking.  That is a service I want to give to people.  To inspire them to be the true potential that they truly are.  To have a love affair with themselves that I believe will change their lives and the lives of others.  This is what I want to share on Day 2.

Day 1 The Start

This year is an experiment of life in a new way. I am not going to give myself any crap. How about you? Our minds are full of damaged ideas, beliefs and things we have created over and over in our lives. I was taught by everyone I ever met, the media, schools and simply the consciousness of most humans. This was brought to my attention through many years of practice. I have been listening to that crazy voice that has brought me down. I am not down, I am up and I don't need to believe those lies that I made up about myself and everyone else. I am burning my unneeded Burdens. How about you. I don't need to carry everyone else s thoughts and energy's to stay safe. I thought I did. I always thought I was born on the wrong planet because people were so mean. I was a divine soul who came here to love, share, think wondrous things and live them. Yell them out to the world. It is never to late to find your lost voice. It is simply lost it isn't gone. It is the one thing that truly can't get taken away. You living spark. You can voice it in any way you choose. Simply by being is still a voice of life. Let us start with this Day1. Love, Laughter and Light